What is the point of observing our behavior anyway?
How the ACT Matrix helps change behavior through noticing
Last week I did a presentation on some additional applications of the ACT Matrix, and one of the things I covered was a metaphor I use to help shift into the Observing Self perspective. The metaphor is simple, and relies on two components.
First the center circle of the matrix can represent the Self and also the Observation Point from which we can view our experience of living.
From this center place we are able to see our inner and outer experience and how it is functioning for us.
If you imagine that this matrix is a top down view it seems two dimensional, but if you were looking at it from the side, that center circle might appear to be a platform or tower rising up from the center of the diagram.
A person standing on this observation tower would have a clearer perspective of everything happening around them. A participant in that training said it reminded them of a forest ranger tower.
The metaphor that I use is that of the high chair that an umpire uses in a tennis or volleyball match.
From this high chair, the umpire can observe the players from a different perspective allowing him to call the game as he sees it. (In theory, the umpire is also a fair and impartial viewer.)
Rather than being on the sideline, the point of observation in the matrix is exactly in the center of the diagram, giving a 360 degree view.
Any time we ask our client to shift their attention to different parts of their experience we are asking them to get into this high place of observation.
The matrix provides nine different points of observation.
We shift our clients attention to these nine different points through the questions we ask them.
“What are you noticing in your body as you say this?”
“Are you aware of the sound of your voice right now?”
“What thoughts are showing up along with that?”
“What do you think this feeling is trying to express to you?”
“As you’re sitting here noticing this, what else are you aware of?”
But what even is the point of observation anyway?
The reason that ACT Matrix work relies so heavily on noticing behavior (and not much else), is because we take the assumption that our behavior changes when it is observed.
Think about it. You do not act the same way you do at home as you do out in public. You don’t speak the same way in a church as you do when hanging out with friends.
If there was a camera set up in your bedroom recording you 24/7, your behavior would be much different.
Through consistent use of the ACT Matrix we establish a system of observation. We give language to experience that was previously mysterious. We assign function to behavior that previously happened “just because.”
And importantly, we assume that our behavior not only changes when it is observed by an external third party. But that it also changes when we ourselves observe it.
In RFT terms this is called establishing hierarchy, or containment of our experience.
When we use the matrix over and over, we engage in an ongoing conversation with ourselves, about who and what are important, about what inner experience is showing up and how it functions for us. About what we are doing with our hands and feet, voice, time, and energy, and how that is working for us.
I think it was Hank Robb that said something along the lines of, “Wisdom is your past self communicating to your present self.”
Try this simple observation exercise for yourself
As you are reading this, see if you can notice something that is happening above your head in whatever space you’re in.
. . .
Now, notice something that is going on at chest level in the space you’re in.
. . .
Now, notice something below your knees.
. . .
Now check in with how connected you feel to the present moment, and the physical space around you.
. . .
Who is the person capable of noticing what’s going on above your head, in front of you, and below your knees?
. . .
And who is the person capable of noticing that you’re noticing?
Respectfully Submitted,
Jacob Martinez // Through The ACT Matrix
In other news
I’ve talked before about my rabbit Charlie.
In February we adopted a friend for him, named Mabel. Here they are being gently stroked.
We are currently undertaking the arduous process of bonding them together. You see you can’t just get any two rabbits and put them together, they’ll kill each other. So rabbits must be bonded through a process of systematic desensitization.
If you’d like to support Mabel and Charlie, feel free to donate to their Veggie Fund.
