Willpower and the ACT Matrix
The name is Blaine, David Blaine
Over the past several years I have been working through a long-term project that will ultimately take me 15 years to complete. I’m currently on year six. I’m feeling only a slight mixture of embarrassment and pride as I tell you that the project is watching all 15 seasons of the original CSI: Crime Scene Investigation episodes on the anniversary of their air dates. The show ran for 15 years, which means that it takes exactly that long to finish. I take every hiatus, every writer’s strike, every sports game schedule shift that happened 15 years ago. I’m perpetually 15 years behind every episode that I watch. As far as I know I’m the only human being on earth that is doing something like this.
Why do I do this to myself? It’s a form of anti-binge watching that I came up with a while back. You see, I want to get the complete experience of watching a show. Waiting week to week, season to season, just like everyone else did when they watched it live. This kind of rewatch is something I’ve done before, and it takes considerable willpower to achieve. My spouse and I joke that I am a “Shitty David Blaine”. (Remember when David Blaine used to do cool magic tricks, but then he started doing stuff like “How long can I live inside this block of ice?” and “How long can I stand up on this small tower?”, That’s me but with TV shows).
And this relates to the matrix how???
Often, I see matrix practitioners use the ACT Matrix as if it is a willpower machine. That is to say that their main aim is to help clients resist doing Away Moves and promote doing Toward Moves.
The ACT Matrix—as I teach it—is not about cultivating willpower, it’s about cultivating an ongoing conversation with the Self, and noticing the distinction between problematic rule governed behavior and values guided behavior. This is accomplished through increasing awareness, or simply noticing the effects of our actions on our lives and the world. That circle in the center of the matrix is there for a reason, that’s ME noticing and ME doing.
If you do the matrix enough times the four main questions from the quadrants begin to seep into the ongoing process of living.
As we go about our days we want to be continually asking ourselves:
“Who and what are important to me?”
“What’s showing up on the inside right now that is getting in the way of connecting to what’s important to me?”
“What am I doing in response to that stuff on the inside?”
“What could I be doing to move me closer to what matters?”
As we answer those questions again and again we begin to loosen the pull of automatic responding and are freed to engage in a vital and fulfilling life.
We can even do cool tricks when it comes to having that conversation, like adding in perspective shifting:
“What would the 80-year-old version of me think is important?”
“How would I perceive the stuff showing up inside me if I were an artist?”
“What would my mentor respond to the stuff showing up inside?”
“What would the wise, courageous, and compassionate version of me be doing in this situation?”
As you use the matrix with clients I want you to try to catch yourself attempting to pull the client away from Away Moves and pushing toward Toward Moves rather than simply helping them notice what’s going on in their life. And I wonder what would happen if you noticed yourself doing that. . .
// With gratitude, Jacob
P.S.
Some people have asked how they can tip a few bucks for coffee in support of what I do here. I don't drink coffee, but my rabbit Charlie 🐇 eats his weight in hay and greens every day. Your support helps me keep the hunger machine at bay.
P.P.S.
There are other Shitty David Blaines like me out there. Check out this instagrammer, TinyGhostGrace who takes a photo of herself posing the exact same way in various costumes over and over and over and over and. . .